Wishin' and Hopin' and Pukin' and Poopin'....

Not quite what Ani DiFranco had in mind...but it totally sums up the ending to my weekend. I was ready...ready, to channel hop between the Sopranos and Desperate housewives and then the battle would begin between Big Love and Grey's Anatomy. I had been doing my thumb exercises all week and I was ready to enjoy both shows simultaneously!! (Yes, I am that good).
Where is the TiVo you ask?? (Whole other story)

So H is really being a snot and won't get in the bath, won't put his diaper on, won't sit still for his P.J.s and I was soo angry at him. --then the unthinkable happened...he was laying on his back, while I was wrestling him down for a diaper and he literally tossed his cookies in the air!!! If I hadn't seen it, I would not have believed it. Needless to say, I was horrified and threw him in the shower. Blueberries and Milk...not a good look!!!

I get him cleaned up, calmed down, and finally attempt to put him to bed - he goes down without too much of a fuss and I catch Grey's Anatomy...to exhausted to channel surf, I finally fall off to sleep. Dh runs in around 3 a.m. and asks me what to do about H's diarrhea....CRAPPPPPPP!!! I didn't know he had diarrhea. So I get up and help with the change and we get H calm and try to figure out what the hay is goin on. He finally falls asleep on Dh's chest on the sofa and I make my way back to our bedroom--then this very strange feeling starts to wave over me and I need to lean on the bathroom wall. I feel my stomach churning and I manage to get the word H.E.L.P out and before Dh can make it in .....I am pukin all over the wall and inches away from the toilet...This is a huge undertaking, because I am not the puking type- by that I mean I can count on 1 FINGER - HAHA how many times I have ever thrown up and it was while carrying another human being in my belly!!! I don't do upchucks!! So, I am completely at a lost and totally freaked out!!! Then the poopin starts ---I finally fell asleep around 6 a.m. after I managed to email my boss and let her know - I would not be able to make it in today.

All day on Monday- I swore I was going to die....at one point I thought it would actually be easier than to continue to feel the way I was feeling!! Dh bought me some gatorade (orange) I will tell you why this matters later...and by mid afternoon I could feel the dehydration setting in!!!

I started to sip the gatorade slowly, but would have to go the bathroom minutes later-- At this point I am shocked I have anything left to exit my body!!! Well believe it or not the orange gatorade wanted out too!!! And there it went....orange UN-solid poo...down the toilet. For a second I was truly amazed!!! LOL and I even wondered hey, what If I had drank the blue kind...But after the 9th or 10th flush, it's sooo- not amusing anymore.

H and I battled this for 2 days straight and I am just feeling like I am back to normal. Whew!! I will swear to give away every shoe in my closet, not to have to live through that ever again!!


Well...yea every shoe!